Guys, I am not sure if you have ever experienced this, but this is something that God had shown me. We live in a world that gets WANTS and NEEDS so deeply intertwined that we can’t tell the difference between what is necessary to live and what we think we need to be happy.
I have seen in so many relationships where pressure arises when the man is expected to provide for a woman’s wants. Now every person has wants and that isn’t a bad thing in itself and it’s fun for a man to provide his wife what she wants. When it makes her happy, it makes him happy. There is a huge blessing in giving abundance to the one you Love!
But what happens when the woman’s expectations of provision for her wants supersedes the means or even desires of the man? When the bar is raised so high that it isn’t reachable?
FAILURE HAPPENS. When a man can’t provide to make his wife happy it is a means for disaster. If he can’t succeed in that provisions, it could lead to a downward spiral of not feeling adequate enough to give the woman what she wants. The standard is unreachable and the man will eventually give up trying because he knows his efforts are meaningless.
That is where so many people go wrong with mixing up wants and needs. We create this gap between the two based on our own selfish desires. God always provides our needs and promises to do so. He gives us breath, food, water and other things that are mandatory to live. But He doesn’t always provide our wants. I am still waiting on that winning lotto ticket!
Only when our wants align with what He is willing to give, do we see our wants provided for. But we have to understand that anything that is given to satisfy our wants is based solely on grace and grace alone. It is God blessing us out of His own heart to do so, not out of the promise of satisfying our needs. When we expect God to give us out of want, we put a demand on him that He never guaranteed. Our wants come from our own selfishness unless that desire is from Him, then He will give you that want, but only out of His grace.
When we raise the bar into our wants and expect it to be given to us, we are operating out of entitlement. We are not owed our wants from anybody, not God, not our spouse, not even our parents. We are given our needs and should never expect somebody to give us more than that. When we do this we only set our self up for failure and disappointment. Especially if our wants are outside of what is wanted to be given.
When we rest in our needs being satisfied and are content with that, our wants, if given, become a place of gratitude and thankfulness. And that will always dominate entitlement. God wants a thankful heart, so leave your expectations at your needs and anything above should be seen as a total blessing.
I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.